Updated: Nov 18, 2020
Please don't get us wrong, an authentic "I'm sorry" when you've actually caused harm or wrong to another person is entirely acceptable (and very much encouraged)! But, if you are one of those people that finds yourself apologizing for everything (even casually) more often than not, consider...
You are probably using "I'm sorry" as a polite entry point for conversation, but, by doing so, you are ever so subtly undermining your personal power and worth.
Why do we do this in the first place? Maybe we think we're being perceived as thoughtful or don't want to be rude, or, worse, we literally ARE sorry for taking up someone else's time and energy.
Every single time one of us utters the words "I'm sorry" when we didn't do anything wrong, we reinforce that any attention, even deserved attention granted us, is actually undeserved-- over and over again until they and our own brains actually start to believe it.
So, if you are one of those people that find yourself apologizing to the person that bumped into you on the street, to the waiter that brought you the wrong order in the first place, or to your boss for taking up his/her time to ask for a raise, STOP.
If you're now thinking "how?" or "I'm sorry, I really don't know how to stop saying I'm sorry..." try replacing "I'm sorry" with "thank you" as often as you can. You'll start to see this replacement is applicable far more frequently than seems logical, and more importantly, you'll find that you can get what you need from others more often with less struggle, gift a positive moment to the other person by expressing your gratitude for their attention, and, most importantly, start to fully realize and understand your personal value.
And don't forget to watch our first-of-its-kind shoppable sitcom, Adulting with Jane!
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